Brett Favre signed by Patriots

Bill Belichick’s historic juggernaut that is the New England Patriots has searched far and wide for a quarterback to serve as Tom Brady’s replacement during the first 4 games of the upcoming suspension. From Tim Tebow, to Matt Flynn, to 45 year old quarterbacks, there don’t appear to be many options out there for this enigmatic franchise. Brady is expected to be out four games for his participation in #deflategate. He is currently appealing the decision with Commissioner Roger Goodell and the NFL. The penalty could be reduced to 2 games, or as fans hope, eliminated completely.


In the meantime, Belichick needs insurance that his team will have a functional QB when the season starts. Aside from a couple otherworldly performances from Matt Flynn his career has a starter has been lackluster at best. This has left the Patriots’ head coach scratching his head and searching for creative answers. With the season slowly inching closer Belichick went back to the old NFL stalwart, Brett Favre.

Per a league source, Favre has been released from the reserve/retired list. This allowed Favre to enter the waiver wire. Fortunately for the Patriots no other team even considered signing 45-year old Favre.

The detailed are still be finalized but reports say he signed a heavily incentivized 1-year, $2.2 million dollar contract with New England. Most of his salary is dependent on his performance. The gunslinger will surely be prepared to conquer his foes on the field, ripped beard and all.

Favre told reporters,

“I can play,” Favre said. “As far as throwing. Of course, look at those ducks Peyton Manning throws in comparison to what I can do.” **flexes bicep**

“Do I think I could play and lead a team? Look, no. But I could play. I could make all the throws I made before, I just couldn’t throw it near as far, but that never matters anyway.”

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